THIS IS THE BEST NEWS WE COULD HOPE FOR: Brisbane Broncos Australian National Rugby League NRL Community Are Overjoyed as Head Coach Michael Maguire Makes Announcement of Making Prop Payne Haas the……view more
Speaking before a packed media scrum at Red Hill this morning, Maguire stepped up to the podium wearing what onlookers described as “a grin usually reserved for grand final victories or unexpected public holidays.”
After a dramatic pause that left journalists breathless, Maguire declared:
“Starting today, Payne Haas will officially become the Broncos’ first-ever Forward Captain, a role designed specifically for him—and, honestly, for the rest of rugby league to fear.”
The room erupted. Reporters gasped. One cameraman allegedly sprained a wrist trying to zoom in too fast.
A New Era of Leadership
According to Maguire, the newly created Forward Captain role gives Haas expanded leadership responsibilities—including setting the tone in the middle, mentoring junior forwards, and, according to one leaked document, “maintaining general mountain-like dominance.”
Fans online immediately went into meltdown, with hashtags like #HaasCaptaincy, #ForwardKing, and #MaguireMasterstroke trending within minutes.
One supporter wrote:
“This is the best news since we signed him the first time. The league isn’t ready.”
Another simply posted a GIF of a freight train.
Haas Responds With Trademark Calm
When asked how he felt about the historic promotion, Haas shrugged with the relaxed confidence of a man used to carrying multiple defenders on his back every week.
“Yeah, pretty humbled,” he said. “I’ll just keep doing my job… maybe with a bit more yelling.”
Teammates reportedly celebrated by forming an impromptu tunnel for Haas to jog through, though witnesses say he simply walked through it—slowly—causing three players to fall over from imaginary contact.
Broncos Nation Rejoices
At Broncos Leagues Club, the atmosphere turned festive instantly. Fans ordered rounds of celebratory schnitzels while chanting “CAPTAIN HAAS! CAPTAIN HAAS!” A life-sized cardboard cutout of Haas was fitted with a captain’s armband within minutes.
Club officials confirmed they are considering releasing limited-edition “Forward Captain” merchandise, including:
- “Haas 2.0” training tees
- A novelty steering wheel symbolizing him “driving the pack forward”
- A commemorative poster titled “The Haas Authority”
League Rivals React
Other NRL clubs were stunned but respectful.
One anonymous coach reportedly muttered:
“Great. As if he needed another reason to dominate us.”
Meanwhile, bookmakers saw an immediate shift in the Broncos’ premiership odds—some fans swear they heard a cash register sound from the future.
A Moment Brisbane Will Never Forget
The announcement marks a new era for the club, igniting fresh hope and electrifying the fanbase.
And if this morning’s reaction is anything to go by, one thing is certain:
