𝗜 𝗖𝗔𝗡’𝗧 𝗕𝗘𝗟𝗜𝗘𝗩𝗘 𝗛𝗘’𝗦 𝗚𝗢𝗜𝗡𝗚: 𝗗𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗮𝘀 𝗠𝗮𝘃𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗰𝗸𝘀 𝗦𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝗖𝗼𝗼𝗽𝗲𝗿 𝗙𝗹𝗮𝗴𝗴 𝗦𝘂𝗯𝗺𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗹𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲…… 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲

 In what is being called the most shocking development since the invention of the 3-point line, Dallas Mavericks small forward Cooper Flagg reportedly submitted a resignation letter to the team today.

According to sources, the letter was delivered in a sealed envelope, handwritten in glitter pen, and signed with the phrase: “Sincerely, a man who can’t handle success.”

Inside the letter, Flagg allegedly wrote:

“Dear Mavs,
I appreciate the opportunity, but I’ve discovered something about myself: I’m allergic to winning.
Every time we start to build momentum, my body breaks out in excitement. It’s dangerous.
I must step away for my health.”

The Mavericks organization is reportedly “stunned, confused, and slightly annoyed,” with one staff member saying, “We didn’t even know he could write a letter that long.”

Fans immediately flooded social media with memes, including one viral post that read:
“He’s not leaving—he’s just taking his talents to the craft store.”

Even head coach Jason Kidd reportedly asked, “Does he know we’re trying to win games?”

A league spokesperson confirmed that the NBA is reviewing the letter for authenticity, but added, “We’ve seen stranger things. Like last year’s MVP debate.”

In a surprising twist, Flagg was later spotted at a local bookstore purchasing a self-help book titled “How to Quit Your Job and Become a Poet.”